Maskara Ni Hudas

Ang sarap ng yung ngiti
Tila angel sa langit na kay puti
Ngunit sa likod ng bawat nilalabi
Kawit ni kamatayan ang yung hinahabi

Dito sa bayan ng mga baluga
Pinangako mo ay sagana
Nagbayad ang mga timawa
upang makamit ang pangakong kay saya
Ngunit maltrato sa singkit ang nahita.


Si manong ngayo'y naghihinagpis
Pamilya sa pinas ay nahahapis
sa bagyong humahangos sa inis
ne singko walang maihagis

Puso koy nawasak
ng matanto ang dinanas
Ikaw na naka maskarang hudas
wala mang tulong na ginawad
bagkus nangutya pa ng wagas

Di mailarawan ang yung suot na maskara
nang magulantang ka sa aking naging aksyon
halika at humarap ka, magtuos tayobg dalawa
ako naman ay laging handa

Ngunit gaya ng iyong naging gawi
Maskara ni hudas ay iyong ginamit
nakangiti sa akin na kay tamis
tila angel sa langit na umaawit
inosenting tukmol ang yung gamit.


Sadyang ganid ka, uhaw sa kwarta
ahasin ka nawa ng yung sariling maskara
nang madanas mo ang hirap
at sakit na dinulot mo sa iba.

NOSTALGIC

Happy Days with Pudra.. He will always be the Best Father in the Universe

I open my blog to read some of the writings of the blogger I follow.
there is one particular blogger who i always read his work, Limarkx 214 i open one of his work titled
 EUTHANASIA by limarx214 (http://limarx214.blogspot.com/2013/08/euthanasia-reblog.html)

One word to describe how i feel now after reading it.. NOSTALGIC... feels like i was grab by some sort of shadow and brought me back in time when i have to endure the pain of seeing my father with the tubes that keep his heart beat... keeping him alive but soulless.. The pain of angry to GOD for why HE had chosen my father to suffer this incurable curse, when there are lots of maniac roaming in the word who doesn't even deserve to live.

Every word Mr. Limarkx mention on his blog strike back like a blade of samurai, cutting my flesh in a thin slices. Every moment on that day is like hell, when i have to watch him with my own eyes as the life drain out of my father's body. I did everything to grab his soul, I gave all my best to chase the reaper away, in some point i almost... almost sold my soul.

In all sort of gambling i lost big time in this game. I bet everything, i bet my whole chips... all in, I got 4 Aces on my hand .. the reaper got Royal Flush.. this dark hooded robe flush my father's life right into the pit of death.The reality was like a drugs that brain freeze me and my emotion. No tears no words... totally empty, totally lost.

My Father was not perfect but he is the best, he is my strength, my guardian angel, my ultimate HERO, my savior. He was the only person who believes in me when everyone around me  try to knock my spirit down, He is the only one who grab my hand and help me to stand in my feet every time I stumble. He always tell me to stand, lift my head up and believed to my self, that I am worth of everything, that I m strong. He taught me to be tough, but the latter crashed down when he left.

For six consecutive months I was soulless.. six months  of slapping the reality into my face,  then he come back and visit me in my dreams, he have given me a reason to feel alive, that's when I got my third child and I fully restored my life the day i saw my little angel's face, a replica of my father. It may sound crazy but in a way my father tap me in my shoulder to remind me that I have a family who depend on me and who love me, and that I have not to worry if ever I stumble in this road that I am traveling, coz I have my husband next to me to help me stand and my children to give me strength  on this walk of life... most specially He remind me that I am not alone.

Ramdom 1.0

First time mag random, maraming nais isigaw ang aking isipan, ngunit wala akong mahanap na tamang salita upang ibahagi sya, kaya mag random na lang ako sa mga nangyari sa aking nitong nag daan na araw.




1. Masaya at pagod ang week end, sa kaunaunahang pagkakataon nakapanood ng sine kasama ang mga anak at buong napanood ang palabas, madalas kasi nasa kalagitnaan na ng palabas ay nag yayaya nang lumabas ang mga bata. Iba siguro ang dating ng mga menions at talaga namang nag stick till the end ang mga kiddo's ko.

2. Habang nanood ng sine, sa sobrang tuwa ng aking bunsong anak, isinabog nya ang popcorn at pinaulanan ang nasa tapat namin, buti na lang at mabait ang kana na nasa tapat namin, sabi nya Dont worry .. its ok he just a kid and so adorable.. ngumiti na lang ako at nag sorry sabay hawak sa kamay ng aking bunso, natakot akong pahabain pa ang aming pag uusap at baka lumabas akong duguan ang ilong.

 3. Its a sad monday ang tatay ng aking Mama Kele ( yaya ng aking mga junakis ) ay namatay, maga ang kanyang mata nang pumasok, bigla tuloy ako nalungkot at naalala ko ang lungkot na naramdaman ko nung ang aking tatay ang namatay. Kaya Sad day din kasi pinauwi ko sya ibig sabihin walang magbabantay sa aking mga anak, wala akong kasambahay at me work pa, kaya lagare ako akya baba sa office at sa aming kwarto. ( sa isang building lang kasi ang tinutuluyan namin at ang pinagtratrabahuan ko )

4. Tumulo ang laway ko sa ganda ng Sony Xperia, ipinangalandakan ng anak ng amo ko ang kanyang new phone Sony Xperia, tapos bigla bigla nag ring ang kanyang phone , gusto kung matawa pero inubos ko ang powers ko para pigilan yun dahil kalalaking tao ang kanyang ring tone ay "Hey i just meet you and this is crazy but here's my number so call me maybe".

5. Pagod much nitong tuesday at wed dahil wala ang aking Mama kele ang hirap mag trabaho at maging isang Ina ng sabay. sakit sa bangs pero masaya naman.